Why then asking my self, evaluation is the best thing to do for whatever is happening to me this days. A lot of questions that boggled my mind and trying to justify every area of which i know i made a mistake. The mistakes that lead me into blaming myself, punching these words "why" and "if only". Well this is life and we cannot gauge everything that's not yet formed i mean we cannot assumed that everything that will happen would be right and there would be no wrong from the moment i came out from my mothers' womb.
A crazy thoughts, nerve wracking discoveries, and the painful experiences that i have been through this days is kinda frustrating for me.
Okay, i will not gonna hide the fact that i am losing weight, and having this boils "pigsa" on the whole part of my body! I lied to you that i am well, but the truth is i am still suffering from that holocaust. It was painful; it dishearten me every night, it gives this extreme feeling of distress. I think every month 5 or 6 will gonna surprised me and i will just gonna be shocked to find them either at the back, front, butt, or even on the most precious part of my body (face). It is gawky to showed up, it's embarrassing to go to malls because it's uncomfortable to walked.
Most of my shirts got this messy stains,that marked, from it. Some people asked me about this, and i cannot even say any words to justify my self, because i know that is embarrassing, really does!
So i went to the doctor this day, and got checked. I was at first afraid, of what would be is his initial findings, or is this an indication that i have HIV. (hehehehe) But thanked God, he never say any words as this. " do you sleep early, do you eat well and at the right time? " Ofcourse i should be honest, i told him, that all of that questions the answe would "NO". I told him about my boils and how it affects my daily life, and i am losing weight. He stare at me and said, " you might have "toxic goiter" or a "diabetis". Uh! Oh! that's frightening. Gosh....
Guys it would be painful for me to know if i have either of this two. But that would determined my faith to God, and i know He will helped me from this case. I believe that " For with God, nothing is impossible" (Luke 1:38)
I have to do this series of labs. CBC
Fasting blood sugar
Creatinine (free T4)
I don't know what are those, but i will keep you posted from time to time about my situation. To those people who loves me, and who know me in this Blogosphere, i need your help. PRAYER!
Thank you so much...