I am waiting in this borrowed time,
Wishing you will come;
The heart is pounding in pain and pressure,
You might leave and stay away...


What if I have to move on,
Taking chance on going away;
Empty heart and empty spaces beyond,
Foot prints of my heart's undone...

It's a living sacrifice to love-
Shedding tears and crying out;
For hear from you and see the smile,
My tons of tears run dry...

I am inlove a far cry from,
the "Karma"  from all I've done;
Bunch is more to come,
To test my faith on staying long...

I made this poem to show how i feel right now. How my heart pumps and giving love to someone who deserved not. But my heart beats fast and it's for him. I'm in pain. I'm tired. Yet my heart commands me to love him, whether he will spare me with love or not. It hurts. May this poem will kick my ass and slap my face..

my heart is burning in pain
wanted to escape from depression
weary and bloody inside
nobody knows how it's gonna be like...


love has no boundaries
worries took over
the beat palpitates
slowly goin' farther...

craving for new life
hoping for a new hope
live like a wood in the lake
no heart, no direction....

a human nature to be sad
sad of nothing, but banging inside
shaking my whole
leaving me empty....

where the heart remains' speechless
where the emotions' stagnant
a gypsy who dreamed to be good
till dawn he had waited for one....

i am a dreamer but has no dreams
a lover but has no love
a survivor but disgorge
meaningless poem would be this...

I was once so happy with the friendship that I had with Gem, all things were perfect and cool to remember. The laughters and the happiest moments that we've been together is always good to remember. but things always changed and always has its own way to go through.

Now, the friendship that we have, broke its way til eternity. things got so cramming and I guess we both need to know our boundaries for better reason in life. I cannot blame my self if I got mad at her nor she as well for me. But the only thing was we destroy the precious friendship that we'd built. I got hurt for everything. But it is always said that we need to move on, and in the middle of the road we could find some new good friends, which would make you happy as well, those times that we had been together would always be forever as good as it is. But it will never be back again into reality. Because it is already broken.

Those times would just gonna be remembered but cannot go back on it. It will remain as a great memories for me.

A great farewell to you my friend.. and take care..

Been days I felt I am sick, all the stuff flows bad. My head,my eyes,my stomach, and now my rectum. All of these part of the body had been facing problem. I feel the pain, everyday and every night. I cannot concentrate in the things that I need to do.

I am thin, and looks pail. I am worried about the payables that I need to pay. And the plans that entitled for me. How can I make it?

Jesus just keep my faith, I know I am weak and had lots of mistake that had done to you, but Lord you know better than me. Thank you so much!!!

I was stranded here at my friend's house for two nights, cannot go home, I don't have the money to travel going back there. The bad thing was I got sick and so tired. I felt so terrible, my feet was aching and I need a massage in order to relax. I just remember my friend before that everytime I got sick he always massage me and help me to be calm. Wow!

But now he gone away. And we don't have any communications nowadays.

But I am just thank ful with my friends, like LADY and GEM, instead of letting me to suffer the pain,they helped me to be calm. Especially Gem, she was the one who massage my feet and buy medicine for me to take.

So now, I am at ease, trying to be strong and hope won't get sick again.
thank you Gem and Lady..

It's been 2 days, I am so wasted and really sick. I have cough and cold, my fever was so terrible. At this time, I still have it. I am really worried if this is ah1n1, {patay ako}...

Last saturday, was my very disturbed night at all. I went home from my hosting, so tired my feet was aching, freaking out. Later that night, i felt cold, so I ask my Kuya, {my brother in the house} to do massage, so that all that i felt would be okay.
I guess it was okay, but I am wrong, It was really bad. My back was aching, whoah. Great pain!

Sunday morning, I felt my head will be broken, another freaking harsh thing happen to me.Can't do nothing, instead I kept on complaining, about my back. The worst was, I have on air sunday afternoon, I just imagine what would be is the room, that would be air conditioned. Whoah! bothered again. Well no choice, I need to work, I went to the station and go on board. The room, was really cold!
I kept on complaining to my partner, But if we go on air, nothing's wrong, at last the show had been done, thanks God.

Monday morning, yesterday- Feel better, I am sweating and feel very cool. The boss texted me, to go on board, from 2 pm til 9 pm, hahahahahaha such delirious what should I do? No choice I have to go on board, manager's choice and decision. The same thing, pretending I am well, but really weak. It was very long span of time going on board! Gush!

Now, still going to the station to go on board. I dont know, i still have this illness. Cannot move well.

As i woke up this morning, it is really bad. I felt so bad at all, i hate to move or do anything I keep
on complaining about my back. Something wrong with this i think so.
It is not easy for me to move and do the things which is i wanna do today.
Last night I go to bed early just for me to relax and sleep well.
Well its good i did sleep well.
But the only wrong thing is I got bothered with my back, I felt there is something inside of it that make me disturb every time i woke up every morning. Such strange because i never felt this before. I think this is one of the sign that i am getting older and older.. lol.
Yeah no joke at all- it is really painful. Upon writing this blog, i am bothered cannot really move well, my friends stare at me and ask of what is happening to me, why i walked so different.
Just cannot do move well because of my back.
I guess this is just a part of growing up. And not growing old. Never! I guess so..
"Because growing up, is learning to be strong, learning to be come a better person. Learning to be a good leader, learning to be a wonderful person. And learning to move forward for the better reason in life.
And Growing old is growing with out any directions, no address to be found. Nor great future. Let us grow up and not grow old with anything we impart to make this world more brighter and brighter.
For better reason to live is to help the world not lose this world!!.."

This day I live like a billionaires life. Not that I own wealth but I own something more than wealth, more than money in the bank and whatsoever treasure that the world have. This is something a great fulfillment for me,as such I must prove to you, why this is more than gold and any luxurious treasure that the world have.
All things will be owned if you know how to find it dearly from the bottom of your heart, but this one that I have today is different, if you don't know what to do and how to get this one you better stop. Because it is a waste of time to make it through. For this is a serious matter as well.
I am talking about LOVE. Now this day I am really really happy, I am writing this blog with my boyfriend. He sits besides me, and we are happy staring each other.
A great feeling that i feel today can never be paid by any amount of money, nor treasure that the world have. That is why I better be in love and live a simple life than living like a king but empty hearted! that is the worst life I would have. So meaning in life it is not necessary you got money, if you are not happy to have it. Better to have LOVE, for it will help you to find a better life, than lacking it.
For love will heals the world and make the sun shines. Heals the broken hearted And make the earth dream!

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